The most awesome ways that Hollywood has taught us about how we are all going to perish during our final days on Earth
|
With the Mayan prophecy of the world's end tomorrow (21.12.12) DEEP FOCUS FILM invites you to spend some of your final hours contemplating the form our end will take. After all, if Hollywood has taught us anything, its that when the world ends, it will look really cool.
By Bryn V. Young-Roberts
By Bryn V. Young-Roberts
1. ALIEN INVASION
CURIOUS AS TO WHO STOLE THEIR BICYCLE PUMP A GANG OF EXTRA-TERRESTRIALS COME TO EARTH LOOKING FOR IT, DESTROYING EVERY MAJOR CITY ALONG THE WAY. INDEPENDENCE DAY (1996) A special effects extravaganza that is a popcorn version of United Colours of Benetton. When aliens invade the world relies on The Fly and The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air to save it. It also relies on a LOT of coincidences and a kick-ass speech by the best American President since Bill Clinton. The real dilemma posed is if a stereotypical wise-cracking black guy and a Jewish nerd can stop bickering like a twisted odd couple long enough to give a spaceship AIDS. Oh, and it stars Jeff Goldblum. JEFF GOLDBLUM!!! |
|
2. ASTEROID COLLISION
A COSMIC BASKETBALL PLAYER SLAM-DUNKS A MASSIVE ROCK INTO YOUR FACE, AND THE FACES OF EVERYONE ON THE PLANET. ARMAGEDDON (1998) Before he took to raping childhood memories with his 'Transformers' series of fiascoes, director Michael Bay threatened to destroy us all by dropping a big stone on us, all because a couple of people thought 'Bad Boys' was only an okay film. While the premise of a team being sent into space to save humanity is pretty ridiculous we get to see a lot of cool special effects and Bruce Willis in his best role since 'Die Hard: With a Vengeance'. Oh, and it also gave us an epic song from Aerosmith. |
|
3. SOLAR FLARE
WE ALL DIE OF EMBARRASSMENT AFTER GETTING A WORSE TAN THAN THAT GIRL YOU KEEP SEEING ON GEORDIE SHORE. KNOWING (2009) While He-Man may purport that 'knowing is half the battle' it doesn't do Nicholas Cage any good in this apocalyptic epic that sees a SOLAR FLARE threaten to turn humanity into crispy bacon. Although it may not have the same popular following as the previous two disaster movies in this feature it has gained some kudos for its brave ending (well, compared to most Hollywood movies, anyway). |
|
|